In the vast sea of online content, sounding like everyone else isn’t just boring—it’s forgettable. In a newsletter, social media post, or sales page, your voice is what makes people stop scrolling and start listening. But finding that voice? It’s not as easy as it sounds.
Jacob told me I helped him sound like himself
Jacob came to me frustrated. He had the skills, the ideas, the message—but something was missing. His writing felt flat, like a diluted version of someone more “professional,” more “put together,” more marketable. He’d modeled himself after people he admired but lost his own perspective in the process.
He stopped writing what he thought he “should”
One of Jacob’s biggest breakthroughs was giving himself permission to drop the mask. For years, he’d written the way he thought a “real expert” would—buttoned-up, slightly robotic, and always “on-brand.” But that version of him didn’t resonate because it wasn’t him.
When he started sharing what he really thought—not what he thought people wanted to hear—his writing (and his brand) began to breathe. He cracked jokes. He got vulnerable. He used phrases he’d say out loud. Suddenly, the work felt easy. Natural. Even fun.
His DMs went from crickets to “I feel so seen”
Within weeks, Jacob’s engagement grew drastically. People weren’t only liking his posts—they were messaging him, thanking him for saying what they’d been thinking but didn’t have the words for. Instead of trying to sound smart, he sounded real, and that’s what landed.
People don’t want another authority figure telling them what to do. They want a human who understands what they’re going through. Someone who’s been there. Someone they can trust. And the fastest way to build that trust is by sounding like yourself.
Why your voice feels stuck (and how to unstick it)
Most of us lose our voice for one simple reason: we’re trying too hard to be accepted.
From school to social media, we’re taught to package ourselves in ways that are palatable, professional, or popular. We swap bold opinions for “best practices.” We trade edge for approval. And over time, our voice becomes a collage of everything we’ve consumed, minus the part that makes it ours. So, how do you get unstuck?
First, stop editing yourself mid-thought. The most honest, compelling things you have to say rarely show up when you’re filtering them in real time. Let it be messy at first. Give yourself room to ramble. Voice notes, freewrites, and bad drafts are all part of the process.
Second, pay attention to what feels fun. If writing is a chore, you’re probably not speaking from your gut. Try riffing on a topic in conversation, or asking yourself, “What would I say to a close friend?” That tone is often your real voice trying to peek through. Don’t worry about professionality, be raw, be honest, be crude – anything and everything you really want to be.
And finally, practice saying what you think, even if it feels risky. Authenticity isn’t safe—but it is magnetic.
3 unexpected ways to reconnect with your real tone
If you’re ready to sound more like you, here are three surprising exercises that can help:
1. Write like no one’s watching
Seriously—open a doc and write a letter to yourself. No formatting, no bullet points, no marketing agenda. Just stream-of-consciousness honesty. You’ll be shocked at how much clarity and voice shows up when the pressure disappears.
2. Rant about something that annoys you
Anger and frustration are often powerful access points to your voice. When you’re fired up, your tone sharpens, your rhythm speeds up, and your true language slips out. Don’t publish it—just notice what it sounds like when you stop censoring.
3. Steal from your spoken voice
Record yourself talking about a topic you care about, then transcribe it. What phrases do you repeat? What words light you up? Your spoken cadence often reveals quirks and charisma your written voice has forgotten. Use that as a guide.
